I got the idea for this newest article from a conversation I had not too long ago with some female colleagues of mine. We were talking about our relationships and naturally sex came up. All of them had the same complaint. It wasn’t that their long term partners weren’t pleasing them in bed, but their sexual relationships had become completely routine. It was almost as if their boyfriends/husbands knew them TOO well. They knew just the right buttons to push and what to do to get them turned on and they did it, ever time. The problem? Every time it was the same old thing, they were never surprised anymore. The sex was good, but it lacked excitement. Does any of this sound familiar, guys? I’m willing to bet that there are a lot of men out there that feel the exact same way.
Long term couple sex is good in so many ways. Your partner knows that thing that you just HATE having done to you and she also knows what drives you wild, and vice versa. When necessary you can have quickies and they can still be amazing, instead of leaving one of you wishing for more since you know just what triggers the other person. You can roll over and go to sleep without offending her after because you know neither of you are going anyway. However, while long term relationships definitely have their perks, the downside is that knowing each other that well can also lead to taking each other for granted and letting things getting boring. The following tips on how to turn your love into a bad girl will guarantee that you won’t be bored again soon with your sex life.
1. Sexting – Sexting might get a bad rep based on scandals in the news, but if it’s done within a trusting relationship and you’re careful about what you send and deleting it afterward, it can be a fun and light way to start recharging your sexual relationship. Send a suggestive message (stick with text, not pics) to get the ball rolling. Don’t expect full on text sex, but just something that will get you both thinking about what you want to do to each other later that night.
2. Go public – Have sex in a public place, that is. This doesn’t have to be full-on public, middle of the day sex, although it can be if the two are you are that gutsy! It could be in your car in a secluded spot, in the bathroom at a crowded bar or restaurant, or even in a crowded place where no one is likely to notice what you’re up to. If your partner is hesitant about taking it fully to the next level, experiment first with some under the table hanky-panky.
3. Lights, camera, action – Now a days, everyone has cameras on their smart phones and you can start to put those to good use in the bedroom. Consider having a sexy photo shoot (not just of her, get in on the action yourself!) or you can even shoot your own “home movie.” The nice thing about a cell phone camera is that you can agree to delete it afterward without too much trouble and it’s always handy, usually right there on the bedside table.
4. Practice voyeurism together – Either watch a sexy movie, porn, or go to a strip club together, depending on how adventurous you’re feeling. Or you can even try all three! There is something that feels really naughty about watching others in a sexual way. You’ll have no problem getting in the mood after this activity!
5. Tie me up – Try a few things from the BDSM playbook. If you don’t regularly do any kind of bondage, be sure to start light. Use her scarf or your tie to tie one of you up while the other one has his/her way. Blindfolding can also be incredibly sexy and titillating. Most couples who practice any kind of BDSM have a safe word so their partner knows when they have had enough, even if they are role playing.
Being bad in the bedroom is fun and sexy. There are very few people who don’t fantasize about being really naughty. The great thing is that with a long term partner you can do it without worrying about being judged AND it will give your sexual relationship the bolt of electricity that it’s been lacking.
By Gabrielle Moore
Gabrielle Moore helps couples around the world improve their sex lives. She communicates daily with her more than 300,000 subscribers. Gabrielle is the author of several best-selling books, such as “The Female Orgasm Revealed“, “Turn Her On Faster“, “Hot Licks“, and many others.