• Nationwide
  • Toronto
  • Vancouver
  • Calgary
  • Montreal
  • Los Angeles
  • Chicago
  • NYC
Eligible Magazine
  • Dating
    • Editor’s Dating Notes
    • Better Dating Ideas
    • “The Bachelor” Advice
    • Guy Talk
    • Girl Talk
  • Relationships
  • Sex
  • Events
  • Fashion
    • Men’s Style
    • Women’s Style
  • Lifestyle
    • Gossip
    • Wine & Dine
    • Luxurious Living
    • Entertainment
    • Destinations
  • Wellness
    • Men’s Fitness
    • Women’s Fitness
    • Get Inspired
    • Doctor’s Orders
    • A Better YOU
    • Beauty
  • Bachelor & Bachelorette
  • Cities
    • Nationwide
    • Toronto
    • Vancouver
    • Calgary
    • Montreal
    • Los Angeles
    • Chicago
    • NYC
A Better YOU 0

Feel Better with Focus

By Nicole McCance @nicole_mccance · On May 13, 2013

At night, in bed, when you are trying to fall asleep… what is that persistent thought that troubles you?

When you fail, feel anxious, or become embarrassed, what internal mantra is in your head?

Actually take a moment and write down your thoughts. You may be surprised at the sort of negative conversation in your mind.

We are so used to these negative thoughts, that we often stop noticing them. These can include:

What if I am late for the meeting tomorrow?

What if I screw up during the presentation?

I’m not smart (or capable, independent, strong, or attractive)

I’ll never meet someone

I have failed as a partner (or parent, friend, employee)

Once we recognize where our focus lies, we can start to change our thoughts, and in turn, our beliefs about ourselves. Next time you catch yourself thinking in a negative way, try to be understanding of yourself, as you would be to a friend. If your friend told you that they felt stupid, or hopeless, you would instantly point out their positive attributes, and comfort them.

So show some compassion toward yourself. Comfort yourself, and focus on your own positives. If you feel you have failed, create a plan to succeed next time. If you worry about perceived shortcomings, focus on ways to better yourself. Most of all, try to accept and let go of the past. Focus on the positive future… if you look for it you will start to see the good. 

 

Share Tweet

Nicole McCance

Nominated, RBC Women Entrepreneur of the Year, Nicole McCance M.A. is a fully licensed Psychological Associate. Her services are covered under extended health care and she is licensed to diagnose mental disorders. Nicole is also an author of the best-selling book 52 Ways to Beat Depression Naturally. She has over 9 years of formal university education and has completed a certificate program in trauma and recovery from Harvard Medical School. She has a M.A in Counselling Psychology from the University of Toronto, a B.A. in Criminology and a B.A with Honours in Psychology from Carleton University. Nicole owns Nicole McCance Psychology, which has over 10 counselling locations providing both individual and couples counselling across the GTA. Over 120 individuals and couples receive counselling every month through Nicole McCance Psychology. She has been providing counselling and assessment services for the past 10 years across North America and in Russia. She has been a frequent contributor to media outlets such as CP24, CTV News, CTV National, Global TV,City TV, CBC News, Rogers, CBC Radio, ABC Spark, E!, the Toronto Star and Canadian Living. You can visit her website at nicolemccance.com.

You Might Also Like

  • Exploring The East Coast Destinations

    Explore The East Coast

  • Better Dating Ideas

    Better Dating Ideas Vancouver

  • Sook-Yin Kin Lee Entertainment

    Sook-Yin Lee’s New Play Takes on Artistic Censorship in Canada

More from this author

  • A Better YOU

    Childhood Attachment Theory And Adult Relationships

  • A Better YOU

    Personality and Mood Disorders: What Are Their Differences?

  • Get Inspired

    Feel Good Tip #8

No Comments

Leave a reply Cancel reply

Search

Subscribe & Follow

Follow @EligibleZine
Follow on Instagram
Eligible Magazine Pheed
Follow eligiblezine

Find us on Facebook

Eligible TV

Twitter: eligiblezine

  • There really is no place like home especially when our beaches are this beautiful we got together the best beaches… https://t.co/hiMFCfYUoO 04:00:23 PM July 12, 2019 from Hootsuite Inc.
  • RT @EligibleZine: As time goes, on nature takes its course. An aging parent is hard enough to handle, let alone while keeping your relation… 11:43:50 AM July 12, 2019 from Twitter for iPhone
  • Comfort is great when it comes to beds, couches and clothes but for your life it can be limiting to your best poten… https://t.co/Le9uIQq6pg 10:45:15 AM July 08, 2019 from Hootsuite Inc.

Eligible Poll

Eligible Magazine now available on iPad, iPhone and smartphone

  • Contributors

About

Eligible Magazine is a lifestyle magazine for urban men and women who want the best from their dating life, their relationships and themselves. It features articles and video content on dating, relationships, sex, wellness and lifestyle by some of the country's foremost experts. The magazine is available online, for sale on Apple's Newsstand for your iPad or iPhone and soon to be in print.

Recent Posts

  • Two Iconic Toronto Lifestyle Brands Unite

  • motionball 2022

    Motionball 2022 – Why You Should Mark Your Calendar

  • Why A Staycation Is Perfect For Your Next Date Night

  • Perfume for Women: What’s the Difference?

Contact

Contact Eligible Magazine
Work for Eligible Magazine
Advertise with Eligible Magazine
Write for Eligible Magazine
Unsubscribe
Privacy Policy

Search

© 2013 Eligible Magazine. All rights reserved.
  • Sitemap
  • Help
  • Contact Us
  • Terms of Use
  • Copyright
  • Privacy & Cookie Policy
  • Advertising
  • Announcements
Eligible Magazine
Eligible Magazine on Apple App Store