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Guy Talk 0

Modern-Dating Impressions: Mystery vs. Predictability

By Frederick Tuffour @freddatecrew · On August 8, 2016

Continuing the series of Modern-dating Impression Management, this next subject is what separates the versed dater from the rookie.

MYSTERY vs. PREDICTABILITY

Revealing all your cards too soon in the high stakes and game of modern dating usually leads to unsightly losses. There’s absolutely no need to rush your approach and advances with any woman. It’s always best to keep an aura of mystery and intrigue about you, as both serve as powerful attractors in sustaining her attraction for you. Spice things up every now and then!

Yes, I know it’s exciting after having met a gorgeous woman––who’s showing interest in you–– to bare your guts in a fit of romance, all in the name of “getting to know each other better”. But today’s dating scene is counter-intuitive to too much info in a short span; bordering on clinginess. Keep your autobiography to yourself, at least for now! Emotional intelligence, again surfaces as the most important trait of the skilled modern dater, who knows when to hold the horses and when to let loose. Tease and engage her in some banter just to keep her on her toes, be fun! Uncertainty and unpredictability are great in enhancing her attraction levels for you. If she’s used to certain communication patterns with you, switch it up every now and then.

Keep her guessing when you feel things coming to a stalemate, seeing as a little bit of mystery pans out in the long haul. By piquing her interest especially when it seems to wane, you keep her on the edge at all times.  A candid quote I live by is: “confusion is attraction”. Don’t be so hell-bent on attracting a woman in a mechanical and robotic way (the pickup way), that you lose sight of the naturally fun side of genuine interactions. This quote captures the essence of intrigue and its role in keeping things always lively between you and the interested woman. When it comes to 21st century dating success, anything but the norm!

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Frederick Tuffour

Frederick Tuffour is a modern-dating specialist, who takes to this column to reach the single and professional young-adult demographic. A Behavioural Psychology Graduate from the University of Toronto, his anecdotal and well-founded take on modern-dating is documented in his upcoming book Date Crew: Your Winning Drive to Modern-Dating Success. Outside of the dating arena, he pens poetry and indulges in the ambient music scene. Visit his personal blog here.

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