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confidence
Guy Talk 0

Modern-Dating Impressions: Confidence vs Cockiness

By Frederick Tuffour @freddatecrew · On June 16, 2015

Continuing the Modern-Dating Impression management series, this week’s subject is the most interesting yet: Confidence vs Cockiness. Is it better to be confident or cocky? Does it depend on the setting? Perhaps a blend is more ideal? Different schools of thought preside on this matter. Ultimately, however, a dating principle that most successful guys adhere to is this:

“A good lover is a discreet lover”.

After scoring many dates and being adept with women, the tendency to brag about your dating prowess easily surfaces––it is at that juncture, where the most caution is to be exercised. While your reputation as a notorious ladies man and player usually draws in more women, the particulars of these women need to be guarded. By sharing intimate details of your encounters outside of your confidantes, it presents issues of likely irreparable reputational damage and senseless worries for the implicated women. Cockiness easily breaches every discretionary and privacy code––and evidently the unspoken chivalry standard. Remember a true gentleman never tells. That speaks to your ability to be socially tact, and in effect, knowing when to display quiet confidence as opposed to being cocky.

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Bravado easily branches off into arrogance, pretentiousness and outright cockiness, which is a turn-off for majority of women. Evidently, there is a very thin line between confidence and cockiness, making it the more crucial for you to always put your best foot forward. Although it’s common for most men to revel in their conquests, it is just as important to exercise discretion.

Showboating and bragging about your skills with women could pose a red flag, given the wrong setting. While some women are drawn to such overt and gaudy display of sexual prowess––which is essentially cockiness––being confident results in more success. Confidence, not cockiness paves the road to your increased dating success. Over time, your unspoken and quiet confidence––as well as body language––plays a huge role in drawing more women to you.

Who do you think finishes first? The Nice Guy or the Bad Boy? Read More

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Frederick Tuffour

Frederick Tuffour is a modern-dating specialist, who takes to this column to reach the single and professional young-adult demographic. A Behavioural Psychology Graduate from the University of Toronto, his anecdotal and well-founded take on modern-dating is documented in his upcoming book Date Crew: Your Winning Drive to Modern-Dating Success. Outside of the dating arena, he pens poetry and indulges in the ambient music scene. Visit his personal blog here.

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